02 November 2009

Changes

It recently dawned upon me, I don't like myself all that much. Sure, there are some aspects of myself that are impossible to change - things like looks, and height and such. However, there are many aspects over which I do hold control, albeit only to a certain extent - things such as the way I speak and act, how I chose to react in different situations, the list goes on. So from the month of November, I'm turning over a new leaf! Obviously, I wont be a new person overnight, I'm not expecting that though, but I do want them to slowly ease their way into my life.


I don't want to care as much. Im sick of growing miserable over things I've simply over-thought and over-analyzed. I want to get healthy. To get back into shape. I want to focus more. To pay more attention to the things and people around me. I want to stop making stupid decisions that I'll simply end up regretting. I want to be liked. & I want to like myself. Yes, I understand this wont be simple. As I said, I'm not expecting it to be. But how can other people like you, if you don't even like yourself? How much can you mean to them if you're meaningless to yourself? I can't help but become frustrated, because this sounded so much better inside my head. Oh well, shit happens.

photo-cred to monika7777 from photobucket

2 comments:

  1. Please keep us updated, I'd love to vicariously live through your progress and maybe even make some of my own, self loathing is very detrimental.. and crappy.

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  2. good for you deary :) trust me, if you're yourself everything else falls into place. people won't like you, but you won't care. love youuuuuuu

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